See More Worlds: TOILET PAPER -- a story

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

TOILET PAPER -- a story

Well well well!!!!
I didn't think we would have arrived exactly at THIS point!
I mean, I knew we had problems economically, the world over. But this little story, something that happened yesterday, once again made me smile and think "Yes, we really HAVE arrived somewhere!"

Imagine me, in the heat, at the little grocery store near my house, just going in for a few things, one of them being very basic.....
I went in to buy some TOILET PAPER.

I went over the the section that has it, and I found a sign saying that a certain kind was on sale. It was a hefty role, that when you squeezed it it didn't flatten out between your fingers, but stayed firm meaning "there is a lot of paper here, we are not trying to trick you".

I went to the cashier asking if THIS was the one on sale (the other shelf was empty and this one had the same name as the card advertising the sale paper.

The girl left the cash registar (no one was there)
and here comes the good part, so I will write it big....
"NO, this one is for sensitive skin. The one on sale isn't for sensitive skin."
"OH" I said. "I see!"
I was thinking about this, trying to imagine what kind of paper this normal toilet paper was made from, and just how aggressive it could possibly be!"
"Did you want the one that isn't on sale for sensitive skin or did you want the one on sale, that isn't for sensitive skin? I can get you the other one, it's in the back room".
"Well...." thinking about the difference in price and still trying to figure out how they could actually come out and say that one was probably soft and subtle and had a nice feel, and the other one....well, what could it be like I thought.....sandpaper?

"Well, I will take the one NOT for sensitive skin".
The girl smiled, and so did I. And then I remarked in Italian "Siamo proprio arrivati a questo punto, eh?" And she replied, "Sì, proprio a questo punto". And that means....
"We have actually arrived at this point haven't we...?!" And she replied, "Yes, right to this point".

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HOW TO SPEAK ITALIAN...in 60 seconds

Cavolo...means cabbage BUT you can use it when you want to say WOW!
Non so. So simple, and it means, I don't know. The word no, is no (easy) AND the word so comes from the verb sapere which is to know. So is used for I.....io so, I know. But in this case it is so simple...forget the I, and just say NON SO. Everyone will know what you mean, that is that you don't know!!
Raffreddore -- it means, a COLD. Like a fever, a cough, like what I feel I may be coming down with right now. If I want to say that I have a cold, I say "Sono raffreddata". That translates that I have (or I am) with a cold. You can also say "Ho un raffreddore" which means, I have a cold. Anyway you look at it, you will have to stay in bed or around the house, until you become....guarito or guarita, which means that you are cured!
IMPEGNATA!!! That is what I have been lately. BUSY! Lots of IMPEGNI (appointments, things to do, tasks, chores, you name it!) Actually I should say IMPEGNATISSIMA....meaning very very busy. And to tell you the truth, that is exactly how I like my life!
Per favore.....it is a nice way of asking someone "please" do this or that, or take one, or asking a favor. BUT you can also use it with hands wide and saying PLEASE!!! Stop it! Don't! Be quiet! It is all in the way you say it, and your body language. PLEASE!!!!!
Lo.......this is used when you have a noun like Spagnolo.....you see, this word means a Spanish man. Lo is used because the word starts with sp and you have to use lo rather than il, probably because it makes it easier to pronounce the two sounds....lo with sp rather than il and then sp lo sp, not il sp......When, on the other hand you need to use plural, that is Spagnoli, you must change the lo to gli and then say gli spagnoli. Oh my, this is difficult even for me. Signing off now, will be back with an easier lesson next time.
If you know Spanish, can it help you to know Italian?? YES!! Do I know Spanish? NO! But when I hear it, I can understand lots of it, and I am SURE it's because I know Italian.
Differente....it is easy to see what it means. But the hard part is the ORDER you put this word in. You don't want to use it like in English BUT to put it after the noun that you are calling different. Like I want a different book. Vorrei un libro differente. See, it is AFTER the noun, that is how you use adjectvies in Italian. And don't forget to say the letter E at the end....different - TAY.

Curiosities of Italian Life

VERY curious indeed, this Italian life. On the OUTSIDE it looks like people have loads of money, buying expensive iphones, cars, clothes and even eating out and spending money here and there. BUT on the inside, we are all having troubles with paying bills, hoping our children find jobs (most want to leave Italy now, lots do anyhow). So, the curious thing is that Italians look like they are having an easy time, but believe me.............
Moods........hmmmmmmm......when I am on facebook, I see the difference of the mood here in Italy and the mood in the States. There is a huge difference. People here are moody, due to the politics, especially. We just don't have the fun-loving thouughts and moods of the people in the States. Of course, I am from there, so I have a pretty happy mood most of the time. But being in the middle of complaining and low moods makes it even harder to stay up. Grrrrrrrrrr!!!
No shopping list. What do I mean? I mean, when you go to the market, you don't always need to have a shopping list....you see what looks fresh, colorful and good, and then buy what excites you. I have often had guests for dinner without really knowing what I am going to make. I see zucchini, or tomatoes, or something else and then the idea comes to me. That's how it is in Italy, the visual gives one the idea of what to do next.
City streets.....why oh why are there so many HOLES in the streets!! They just wrote about them the other day in the paper, and there are hundreds (or thousands, don't remember) of holes of all dimensions all over this city. And that means uncomfortable driving that is for sure!! Bump bump bump! The rain opens them up more and then they get bigger. They fill them up sometimes but not well enough. Another of Italy's problems, beautiful country, but we have a large share of things that need to be improved.
Politics. Read on!! In Italy, no matter what the occasion, dinner parties, tv shows, meeting people on the street, watch out, because politics and talking about them is what is in store!!! People just can't get together without talking politics. It is a BIG part of Italian life. And talking about it often can get you in trouble IF the people you are talking to think differently than you do. If they are of another viewpoint, watch out!! If you ever saw two Italians with differing views, you will know what I mean.
SNOW....will it or won't it snow? If it does, the curious thing about snow in a small town, is that everything just about STOPS all of a sudden. They are very slow in cleaning up the streets, but in a way it is nice because you can go out and walk all over the place without any cars around, and then, it is very very beautiful and quiet. So.....into bed I go and perhaps tomorrow it will SNOW!!

EATING and other things....in Italy

TOMATOES -- it is easy to talk about tomatoes in this country. And easy to eat them. They come is such a variety, the ones for sugo, the ones for salad. Ones you can cut into little pieces, or lay out flat with oregano and oil and vinegar and salt.....They are so good, they get lots of sun, and people love to use them in cooking. If you don't know how to use them, just ask an Italian mamma in the store. She for sure can tell you everything you need to know.
Good parmesan, bad parmesan. You know, here in Italy we have wonderful parmesan. It is really really delicious. I once heard that in the States they take the waxy part of the parmesan and even use that to be ground into the stuff you can buy in a box. If that is true, that is really terrible!!!! It would be like eating candles!
Lemons. Why lemons? Because you can squeeze them in water, add sugar or honey; you can squeeze it on meat or fish or salad, or use them to decorate a plate. You can use the peel for flavor in a cake, or to decorate the top of a dessert. You can even use half to put into the dishwasher and make things come out sweeter. Why lemons you ask???
Wintertime weight gain. Yes. Easy to munch on cookies, or almonds or parmesan!! Or a glass of wine and nuts, or a bruschetta! Hard to take off that one or two kili.....that means taking a walk, and today it is going to rain, so wouldn't it just be easier to stay inside, with a nice glass of hot milk and coffee and a few cookies??
JUst how sweet do you want things? In Italy, sweets are sweet but not as sweet as in England, or the States. A cake may have something on it, but not as gooey and sweet as in other places. Salt, on the other hand, is used more freely here than perhaps in the States. Foods can often be very salty, though very good too. Sugar and salt, each country has their own way of using them.
Honey.....it's the time for honey lately, because it is cold, and in the evening is a good time for camomilla tea, or some other hot drink. I like to use honey, good for the throat, and tastes so good. The hard honey is the best, easier to bend a spoon getting it out, but better for you and more "real" and usually biological, whereas the liquid might just have some sugar in it, or not be quite as natural.
Sweet potatoes. If you love American sweet potatoes, the ones they serve on Thanksgiving, be prepared to NOT find them in Italy. It is very hard to find them (actually I just heard a Chinese market has them) but the ones they have in the normal markets are white on the inside! Sweet but white! Isn't that strange!
RED WINE (vino rosso) goes with meat, and WHITE WINE (vino bianco) goes with fish. But wine is so good in Italy, especially the really good ones, any wine is fine most of the time. Room temperature (reds) and white chilled.
CELERY?? When I was a kid, we ate celery sticks all the time. With salt, without, in the lunchbox, or at home in a glass of cold water. I think I have never been served a piece of celery like this in Italy UNLESS they served it with lots of other vegetables to create a vegetable platter to dip in oil and salt, and that dish is called pinzimonio. (better check my spelling on that one, and I will let you know!)
I am going to cook when I get to L.A. BUT it won't be as good as in Italy (see my last post under curiosities of Italian life). I try the best I can BUT the ingredients just aren't the same. And the cuts of meat are different too.

See More Worlds

Wednesday, 1 August 2012

TOILET PAPER -- a story

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